Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Party, Party, Party

It has been such a long weekend and I am still recovering. Friday night I went to Chicago with some peoples to get it in. We stayed at our Russian friends penthouse and spent three days partying our ass off.

Friday night was kind of tame because all we did was go to a couple of bars. Two of Russian's friends came with us though and they were such little bitches that I wanted to smack the shit out of them. They both had so much collagen in their lips that we couldn't even understand what they were saying. One of the girls kept glaring at me because Russian was hitting on me hardcore. Lame!

I actually went to bed at a normal time like the good girl I am but everyone else ended up staying up all night. So when I woke up I wanted to go swimming in the pool and go to the lake and go on Russians jet ski. So I did. Robbie got pissed because I didn't wake her up but I wanted her to get some rest so she'd be up for the party that night. The waves on Lake Michigan were no joke and my arms and back are still hurting from flying around on that jet ski so much. But it really kicked ass and I got a really nice tan.

Saturday night we went to a rave in downtown Chicago. I must say that the party scene in Chicago is far better than the scene in my hometown. People were so fucked up and having a great time. I ended up hanging out with some cops for about 45 minutes, much to my friend's disbelief. I always seem to find myself talking to cops or firefighters when I'm all messed up. I find it quite funny. They had some guy against the wall and were searching him and I walked up to them like it was my business and just started having a conversation with one of them. His name was Jonathon and he was actually kind of cute. :)

Me: Hey, what are you doing to that guy? I'm going to call the cops on you
Jonathon: I am the cops
Me: Oh, well good. Get that fucker!
Jonathon: We are...
Me: So you got a girlfriend?
Jonathon: No
Me: Oh well... I think I'll just have a seat then...

After the rave we went to an afterset at this kids house and hung out there until the mid afternoon. Robbie thought she was OK to drive home but we got as far as Wheeling and made her pull into a hotel so we could sleep it off for a few hours. I left my favorite pillow that I've had since I was a little kid in Chicago and I'm pissed. I guess it's not a good idea to try to pack your stuff when you're messed up.

The best part of the whole weekend is we found out about this three day camping event in Michigan that is going on during my birthday in a couple of weeks. I'm going to take a lot of Valium so I don't freak out about the bugs. If it's anything like this weekend I know it's going to be off the hook!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Sexiest camping trip ever

You know that feeling after you've hooked up with someone and it's really really excellent? I've been riding on that feeling all weekend. Robbie and I went out for ice cream with T and J on Friday and got to talking about spending the night up at J's aunts cabin. We had to lie to Robbie's man of course and say we were at Woodie's parents cabin, even though I'm pretty sure her parents don't have a cabin.

I know I've talked about his before but it was quite amazing that I agreed to go since I hate bugs and I can't relax if I know that I am in an environment where there are bugs. Camping has become a nightmare for me which sucks since I used to love to camp when I was young and, spent one week every summer sleeping in tepees at Bethel Horizons Summer Camp.

Camping isn't so bad when you have Grey Goose, two cute boys, and an active libido. We started out playing a drinking game and then sat around the campfire. One thing led to another and I broke my celibacy. The sun eventually came up and I was left walking bowlegged. J has a lot of stamina. I've had a smile on my face ever since and still can't believe I spent 10 wonderful hours in the woods without freaking out about bugs.

I think I'll have to make that my new recipe if I ever go camping again. Boys, booze and sex.

(Oh, and if you're thinking I shouldn't have been drinking you're right. But I've been very good so I believe my liver is OK with it. And it was definitely for a good cause.)

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Joys of moving

It's that time of year again and I'm really not looking forward to it. It's moving time. I want this move to be my last one for awhile so I'm trying to make sure the next place I move is a good one.

The last place we lived was ghetto but nothing as bad as the place I live now. The apartment is nice but the neighborhood and the people are on a level all their own. So far we've have a shooting outside my bedroom window, a constant daily block party where the neighbors sit outside with their folding card tables and their bottles of malt liquor, and people stealing stuff out of the laundry room.

Two nights ago I was doing laundry and came downstairs to get my clothes out of the dryer to find my laundry basket gone. I basement doors are locked now so you have to use your front door key to get in. Someone from my building stole my basket in the 30 mins it took me to dry my clothes. I am so tired of these people. Just because you are broke asses doesn't mean you can't have any class and need to steal from your neighbors.

So in my search for a new place I've been making sure to check out the reviews to see what previous tenants have said about the properties. I found this one on the site for an apartment complex that is across the street from my job:
*************************************************************************************
RENT AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!!
From: -Anonymous-
Date posted: 10/8/2007
Years at this apartment: 2006 - 2007

I moved in last winter and thought to myself, "Hey, this place is pretty nice". It didn't take long for me to figure out that there was a lot of illegal activity going on here. 2 days after I moved in I read an article in their newsletter about vehicles being vandalized in the parking lot. I so far, have not been a victim of that (knock on wood), but know of several neighbors that have had break ins, vandalism, etc. The garage does have cameras; turns out they're fake though. No joke! One of the cameras had been torn out of the wall and I told this person who was working in the leasing office about it. She wasn't the normal girl who was working there as they had a change in the on site manager. She was training the new girl Emily, who has been very nice. This woman (not Emily) told me that the cameras down there are phony. WHY WOULD YOU TELL YOUR TENANT THAT'''''' I'm not the type of person who participates in illegal activities but it does make me wonder how many other people know about these bogus cameras.

The deal with this place is that some of the units fall under a special reduced rent program based on your income that is financed through HUD or something. That being the case it is merely assumed that low income housing will attract low class people. This being said, I would hear loud music at night on the first floor and a very strong odor of marijuana almost nightly. How can you smoke so much weed that the entire floor would know' There were always people coming and going that did not live there, an obvious sign of drug dealing.

The place was dirty, but you can't blame management. They do the best they can to keep the place clean but there are people there who just don't care and leave garbage in the elevator, common areas, and garage. Several tenants' storage lockers have been broken into and most of the unassigned lockers are filled with trash that prior tenants have left behind. Someone also urinated in the elevator on 3 different occasions and someone also must have gotten into a fight in the entry way to the garage because the drywall looked like a 200 lb man was shoved into it.

The worst part is coming right up. My girlfriend was visiting from out of town with her 16 month old nephew and had to make several trips up and down to bring things in the boy in her arm. She mistakenly left the vehicle unlocked while making a trip and someone had the nerve in that short period of time to go into the wallet in her purse and steal her debit card, credit cards, and all gift cards. She did not even know about it until the banks started calling her about restricting access to her card for suspected fraudulent activity. Whoever took her cards went on a shopping spree and that person most likely lives in the same building or knows someone who lives there.

IN CONCLUSION, RENT AT RISK!!!!!!! I STRONGLY RECOMMEND RENTING ELSEWHERE UNLESS YOU WANT TO DEAL WITH TRASHY DOPE PEDALING, CRIMINAL THIEVES!!!!!!!! GIVE IT A FEW MORE YEARS AND THEY'LL RUN IT COMPLETELY INTO THE GROUND.
*************************************************************************************

After reading this I weighed out the pros and cons.

Pros:
People that sell drugs aren't always bad.
There may be some hot guys in the building (who maybe have some weed)
There's a pool
If I'm loud my neighbors probably won't call the cops
The neighborhood looks nice
There's a washer and dryer in the unit

Cons:
People that sell drugs can be bad
I hate dirty people who litter
My car could get broken into and then I'd be pissed (not that there's anything in that piece of junk)
Management sounds like some pushovers who have no clue wasn't going on (which could be a pro unless it affects me of course)

So what do you think? Think I should keep looking?

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Jumping Ship

I don't know what day it is for sobriety and I don't care. I've been good so that's all that matters.

This summer is so different from last summer that I can't help feeling nostalgic. Last summer I was 10 pounds lighter, I could drink, there was always something fun to do, and I remember having a blast.

I don't know what it is about this summer but it seems like it hasn't started yet. I don't know if it's the recession or what but people don't seem to be doing anything. I've been swimming once so far but that about covers it. I did go to the Brewers game last week and then spent the rest of the weekend holed up inside.

Even the weather has been off. It's usually super sunny from June through August but all we've had is rain. I like the rain but it's still making things seem wrong.

We found out at work that they will be closing our office and laying everyone off in October. This has been so fun because people have been jumping ship ever since which leaves the rest of us to deal with more work.

The only good thing that has happened this week is the return of True Blood. I love that show. I was worried that I might be disappointed but it was a great episode. A little raunchy humor, more than last season, made the episode hilarious. I can't wait for next week.

I think I'm just restless though. Maybe I'll hit the gym later and work off some of this energy. I have been in a rut with the gym too. I used to love going to the gym and I loved the results I got. But now I just don't see the point. I know people say that you should look good for yourself but I really don't care right now. Not a good attitude to have and I realize this so hopefully I get out of this funk soon.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Unwelcome advances

Day 18 of Sobriety

Sorry it's been more than a week since I last posted but I've been busy. I don't even know what I've been busy with but time seems to be flying by. I got my test results back from my doctor and I am pleased to announce that my liver levels are now normal! I know this doesn't mean I should run back to drinking right away but it does mean that the damage I've done to my liver is not irreparable. That makes me super happy.

Friday night I ended up partying with my friends until the wee hours of the morning. (No I did not drink) One thing led to another though and I found myself exhausted on Robbie's couch at 10 am, grungy and sweaty from dancing all night. I invited my guy James over to kick it because he called and told me he was still up. Now don't get me wrong. I'm always down for a little nooky but there are rules that must be followed otherwise you just kill the mood. Here's what happened:

First, James comes in and sits down next to me on the couch as close as he can. We are friends with benefits so I didn't think anything of it. When I got up to go to the bathroom, he followed me in there and attempted to get it in in the bathroom. At Robbie's house. I've done this before in my drunken party days when I didn't know any better, but I'm older now. Having sex on your best friends bathroom counter while she's in the next room does not fly anymore.

After I pushed him off me we went back to the living room where he continued to rub my legs, and back, and hand over and over. At one point he even put a blanket over our laps and tried to grab me. We relocated to my house to get away from Robbie's boyfriend but that turned out to be an even worse idea. James got even more aggressive and I ended up having to kick his ass out.

WHAT THE FUCK!!

I would have been more than happy to hook up with him if he hadn't been all over me like that. I hadn't even showered and I don't know about anyone else but the smell of my own sweaty ass body is not an aphrodisiac. This is why I'm single.

What a loser. He sure missed out because after he left I got all nice and clean and took care of the problem myself. I guess that saying is true; Never send a man to do a woman's job.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Drunken ramblings

Day 10 of sobriety

Today is day 10 of sobriety and I'm not going to lie. I had two beers within that time but otherwise I've been a good girl. G's birthday was last week and I went to the dinner and then bowed out when they were heading off to the bar. I knew I wouldn't be able to go to the bars with them and not drink, dinner was hard enough, so I left. The weekend was actually really fun even without liquor. I went swimming Saturday and got some color on my pasty ass. Sunday I worked and had a BBQ with the Fam on Memorials day at the park. I thought I was going to be bored as hell all weekend but I surprised myself by participating in some PG activities and having a good time.

I'm not going to lie and say that it's been easy. There have been moments where thinking about the taste of a Leinies Honey Weiss almost made me say fuck it and go buy a 12-pack but I didn't. 10 days baby. I can do it.

Big Brothers birthday is coming up and we're going to the Brewers v. Cubs game. We had otherwise been stumped on who was going to be the designated driver but I guess we know who that will be. Oh well. It's kind of interesting being sober. I've started noticing the funny ass things people say when they are drunk. I'm sure I've said funny ass shit before too but it's different being on the listening end now.

I couldn't help but overhear some people's conversations at G's bday dinner and this is some of things I heard. (oh, and virgin margaritas are just not the same without tequila. I don't care what anyone says. It's not supposed to taste like fruit!)

Conversation one

Drunk Girl to Drunk Guy: "Well, I guess I'll let you hit it later if you buy all my drinks tonight."

Drunk Guy to Drunk Girl: "I guess we can do that. But only as long as you don't get mad at me if I hit on other girls.

Drunk Girl to Drunk Guy: "OK. It's whatever."


Conversation two

Drunk Girl 1 to Drunk Girl 2: "I know this is a stupid question but how do you make the color red?"

Drunk Girl 2 to Drunk girl 1: "Are you serious? You mix blue and yellow."

Drunk Girl 1 to Drunk Girl 2: "Really? I don't know why but I was just thinking about that and I couldn't remember."

Drunk Girl 2 to Drunk Girl 1: "That's OK. I took extra art classes in high school so I remember."

(red is a primary color)


Conversation Three

Drunk Girl 3 to Drunk Girl 4: "So I hooked up with Dave last night."

Drunk Girl 4 to Drunk Girl 3: "Finally. I've been getting tired of hearing about how much you want to hook up with him. How was it?"

Drunk Girl 3 to Drunk Girl 4: "It was horrible. It was so small I barely felt anyting. I actually asked him if it was in and he got all offended. I didn't say this to him but Hey, it's not my fault if you have a little dick."

Drunk Girl 4 to Drunk Girl 3: "That sucks. What a waste of time. You obsessed about him forever."

Drunk Girl 3 to Drunk Girl 4: "I know, right?"

Drunk Girl 4 to Drunk Girl 3: "You should tell him to use Extenze. My brother says it really works."

Drunk Girl 3 to Drunk Girl 4: "How do you know that? Why would you and your brother talk about something like that?"

Drunk Girl 4 to Drunk Girl 3: "Um, it just came up once."

Drunk Girl 3 to Drunk Girl 4: "What kind of conversation were you having where something like that would come up?"

Drunk Girl 4 to Drunk Girl 3: "I don't remember but that's not the point. Just tell him that."

Drunk Girl 3 to Drunk Girl 4: "Sure. I'm going to tell some guy that I hooked up with that his package is small and that he should use Extanze because (Drunk Girl 4)'s brother used it and it worked so it's OK."

Drunk Girl 4 to Drunk Girl 3: "Yeah. I would."

Drunk Girl 3 to Drunk Girl 4: "Yeah. And that's why you're single."

Classic